A modern social phenomena is the role of IPhones in romantic relationships. The telephone has always been a “dating tool”. People call to arrange or cancel plans with a person they would like to get to know better.
The IPhone, Social Media, and Texting have changed the way you meet, engage, and end romantic relationships. What, if any is the impact of these readily available tools or devices on your emotional wellness as an individual or couple?
It may be confusing to you when people with whom you have started a relationship begin to slow down or stop sending texts to you. Today, most do people integrate texting into intimate relationships. At times, the communication grows increasingly intimate and perhaps, too personal.
You may have shared personal views about your sexuality or photos with a person you hardly know. Sexting may seem exciting at first, but the risks you run when engaging in this behaviour is quite high.
There have been several notorious cases in the media about professionals whose better judgement has gotten out of hand.
Breaking up with someone you met online by text is usually messy and hurtful. This is especially true when you have engaged in a romantic relationship that may have involved both emotional and sexual intimacy.
Ending a romantic relationship by text is simply not a mature way to say, “goodbye”. At the very least, you owe a personal call to the person you shared your time, body, mind, and spirit.
It may “feel” easier to send or block texts or to stop responding to your date. However, the pain this causes is often quite despairing for both parties creating anxiety and sadness.
Bringing an emotional relationship to end requires maturity and commitment to speak honestly with one another. Where people truly care for one another, the respect and tenderness that follows will often mediate the painful realization that there is a lack of fit for a longer term relationship or marriage.
Some relationships grow apart. Even those where romance had blossomed over many years and hopes for commitment fuelled connection. Honest self-assessments are important when deciding the direction you are free to take with your own life.
It may be that you have tried to communicate your honest feelings about your relationship with your partner without being fully heard or understood. It may also be that you have missed the signals or words that romantic commitment is not a feature to your relationship.
It is truly your choice to freely engage romantically with a person of interest. It is also your right to end relationships that do not meet your personal, sexual, or emotional needs. The key is communicating your feelings honestly and directly with your partner.
Ending a short or long term romance by text is not a healthy way to end the relationship. Consider meeting with a professional counsellor for healthy ways to say “good-bye” that respect your personal wellness needs and those of your former partner.
Ending well is possible and ensures your personal health and happiness is intact as you move on.
Ending a relationship that steals your sunshine is good idea because sunny dispositions do deserve to shine! Call today
Dr. Lisa Romano-Dwyer RSW
#wellness #healing #romance #healthy #intimacy #love #breakups